Locked in a disabled bathroom in China

People say that it is hard to get around China if you don’t speak Mandarin, at least compared to other countries were you don’t speak the official language. They are not wrong. I have found China more challenging than most every other country I have been to, even with my miniscule amount of primary school Mandarin. Some interesting experiences so far:

Failure to locate food in the third largest city in China!

We found ourselves in the centre of Guangzhou unable to locate any food.* Wholesale shops full of clothes, yes, but no food. 

I also have a ridiculous problem that I am embarrassed to admit. Growing up in Melbourne and going to the schools I did, I have been surrounded by elements of Chinese culture and food. I didn’t realise this until now, but unfortunately this means that I have a strong association between Mandarin characters and food. This has resulted in me thinking I have found a restaurant any time there are big characters out the front of almost any shop. Yes, like I said, embarrassing!

*We eventually found food but it took a minor hike!

We did find a lot of mannequins!

Getting stuck in a disabled bathroom!

I managed to get stuck in a disabled bathroom at Guangzhou train station. I had forgotten my personal supply of toilet paper tissues and upon seeing it wasn’t provided in the female toilet (the norm), I ventured into the disabled toilet. The light didn’t work and apparently the lock was faulty. I completely panicked with images of an IT Crowd episode flashing in my mind (the one where Roy gets caught using a disabled toilet in the cinema and pretends someone stole his wheelchair!) I tried the lock a dozen times, banged on the door and yelled lots before remembering that disabled toilets often have a panic button. Feeling my way around the bathroom I found the toilet and a button. On the other end was woman speaking Chinese…and luckily a tiny bit of English! Relieved, I spent a long time explaining I was stuck. Unfortunately I did not know if I was in the south toilet block or not. She told me to wait. This was of course when I tried the door again and, easy as you like, it opened. I’m still not sure if the gaping cleaner outside had let me out or if I was losing my mind. Luckily we had lots of time to make our train still and when I found Rob again, he wasn’t the least bit concerned!

Urgent bush toilet situation in the rice terraces*

During our time in Ping’An I had an unfortunate run in with an upset stomach. Around the half way mark of a 1.5 hours walk to one of the rice terrace viewpoints it struck. The need for a bush toilet was urgent and this was not one I will forget; there aren’t many places to go when you are amongst rice terraces. I will spare you the rest of the details, except to say it is not an experience I wish to repeat!

*Unrelated to language challenges but a challenge nonetheless! 

Lost in communication?

*Asking for tea at a random village between Dao Zhai and Ping An and receiving puffed rice in soup.

*Singing a line of a Mandarin song I learnt in primary school in the hope that a child nearby would know the song and teach me the rest of it.

*Potentially sitting in the restaurant car of a 21 hour train ride when we were meant to be at our own cabin. (Clue: the conductors were eating their meals there.)
*Fooling our ten year old neighbour into thinking I spoke Mandarin for the first few hours of a 21 hour train ride. Playing UNO to overcome all language barriers.

*Communicating with waitresses at a tiny café dedicated to mangoes via a smart phone translation application.

Puffed rice soup thingo with my little friend

Rob and our 10 year old neighbour - our most enthusiastic UNO special rules player yet

Tiny mango shop in the middle of a shopping strip in Guilin